Victorian Mourning Traditions

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Today when we think of a wake, we think of the celebration that is held following the funeral with food and drink laid on and many stories told about the deceased person. But the term wake had quite a different context in the 19th century. After death the body would be cleaned by the women and laid out in the parlour of the family home. The dearly departed loved one was never to be left alone, day and night, until the body left the house for burial. Hence the term wake. Food and drink would be served to the many mourners, relatives and friends, who came to pay their respects. Keening would be heard throughout the house as women sobbed or wailed loudly depending on the depths of their sorrow.

All the clocks in the house were stopped at the time of death and mirrors were covered or turned to the wall. A wreath decorated with black crepe or ribbons was hung on the front door to alert passers by that there had been a death in the family.

It was not unusual for every article of a women’s clothing to be immersed in a huge pot of black die as she was required to wear black for a period of up to two years. Often black crepe was chosen for mourning cloths due to its lack of sheen. However white was often worn by the parents and siblings of a deceased child.

Post mortem photography was a way for loved ones to be remembered. The deceased person was often represented as if sleeping peacefully rather than dead but sometimes they were posed to look like they were alive.

A tradition that I only learnt about recently was that of ‘Telling the Bees’. Someone, usually a women of the family would knock gently on the hive and tell the bees that someone had died. They would often say something like, ‘The mistress is dead, but don’t you go, the master will take care of you”. The belief was that if this ritual was not performed, the bees might go away from the hive or even die.

Incidentally today is World Bee Day. A celebration of the important part bees play in keeping people and the planet heatlhy. https://www.worldbeeday.org.au/

Does your family have any mourning traditions that have been passed down through the years.

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